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Managing Your Emotional State

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(650) 329-1199

Managing Your Emotional State

I agree with Gary Sherman that managing your emotional state is essential for good mental health. We all become reactive at times. Each of us has a unique set of issues, statements, and behaviors that move us into reaction. Reactivity has a whole range of behaviors that includes anger, sadness, emotional pain, physical pain, and fear. A situation that makes one person feel hurt might make another person turn mean. A third person may even respond to the same experience with compassion. The different reactions are due to our innate uniqueness and the conditioning we received through our parenting and cultural influences.

Helen Keller and a few other conscious people have made statements like "We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are." The message is that everything we experience reflects our inner selves.

© HudStone Images It is my belief that good psychological health is based on how we handle our reactivity. In fact, our reactivity is the primary way we can gauge our level of mental health and emotional maturity. The more often and the greater your reactivity, the less emotionally mature you are. The key is to know under what circumstances you are reactive and to start using your awareness to collect information to manage your emotional state, because it is the responsibility of each of us to manage our own emotional state.

Many of us, at times, try to manage and control the people around us rather than accepting our responsibility to manage our own emotional state. There are times when we do need to confront the behavior of another, such as the alcoholic, the abuser, and the thief. At these times, if we confront the other person with clarity and without undue intensity, we are managing our reactivity and emotional state. You can use your clarity and emotional intensity as your guide to measuring the appropriateness of your response.

These sessions will allow you to look at your emotional state, take responsibility for it, and learn techniques that you can use to reduce your reactivity, so you can behave in a responsible manner, even during times of stress and fatigue. You are your emotional state and it's your job to manage it wisely. This does not mean that you repress or suppress your feelings. All of us must learn to be fully engaged with our feelings and express them appropriately.

It is my belief that all feelings arise from an initial surge of energy from a life situation. Then, our internal conditioning, through thoughts, and images and beliefs, comes into play with that energy to produce the emotion. As you learn to be aware of the energetic fields in your body and how you influence them through thoughts, beliefs, and images, you can start the process of learning to manage your emotional state.