Relationship Enhancement

The truth about relationships is that many of them are not fulfilling. The major requirement for a successful relationship is that you love yourself. Only a few of us love ourselves enough to enter into an intimate relationship with someone else that deepens and evolves.

Almost all romantic relationships shift into love-need relationships.

These needs revolve around feeling secure, supported, and loved, and they may be conscious or unconscious for each individual. The more each partner

Often, one partner feels their needs aren't being met and withholds or withdraws. The polarities of opposition between the two individuals are formed quickly and intensely, and the positive views each partner had of the other are now defined as negative characteristics.

These sessions teach both partners to examine their individual needs and learn to listen and hold the needs of the other as strongly as they hold their own. To me, this is an act of LOVE.

As you both learn to value your partner's perspective as strongly as your own and continue to hold both firmly, you will soon find that the polarities that you have created together will collapse, and you'll discover a new way of being together that works for both of you.

Most of our intimate relationships are with people with whom we have differences that become significant over time. Part of the relationship enhancement process focuses on teaching each partner to accept those differences. If you cannot accept your partner's differences, those differences become fertile ground to create negative, relationship-destroying experiences.

A generalized key guideline is the 5-to-1 ratio. That means that if you experience at least five positive interactions for every one negative interaction, your relationship will be able to grow and be healthy. The opposite is true as well—if you experience five negative interactions for every one positive interaction, your relationship is likely to experience difficulties. The more negative interactions you experience, the greater the chance for marriage difficulties. Furthermore, the longer you maintain the negative interaction pattern, the more difficult it becomes to change course. The more each partner can learn to open their heart and hold their partner's perspective as they hold their own, the more their union will flourish.